Car Battery Man Pride

My very own work.

I'm not exactly the car mechanic type. I'm more than happy to take my car to a shop and pay someone else $20 to replace a headlight bulb. But our car battery just died and I'd feel like a disappointment to my gender if I took my car in someplace to replace the battery. I'm not even sure that places offer that service. If they do, it's probably just a joke - something the car mechanics laugh about behind the door that separates the customers in the lobby from the mechanicy car-fixer-upper room that smells like tires.

"We got a battery guy!" Raucous laughter. Maybe a hoot or too.

Clearly, I couldn't go through that so instead, I got my slippers on and walked into an auto part store and picked up a battery in the manliest, most confident voice I could muster. They didn't even suspect my wimpiness. Although now that I think of it, one guy waiting in line did say with a hint of ribbing, "Don't cross the terminals."

When I arrived home, Alicia informed me that she had called her car mechanic brother for step-by-step instructions on my behalf. I tried to suppress my pride as she relayed these to me. With rachet set, wrench, pipe wrench and screwdriver set in hand (just in case) I assured Alicia that if I died in a garage explosion she'd get both life insurance and home insurance. After 20 minutes of careful work and a difficult wrestle with the battery clamp, I removed the old battery and replaced it with a brand new shiny one. I turned the key and the car started. "Sweet!" I said with a fist pump.

Now I've just got to replace the headlight bulbs on the other car. On the other hand $20 really isn't that much.